Boredom

I've been so bored the last couple of days. I have Crohn's Disease and have been flaring a bit. So, because of that, I'm needing to rest and stay close to the bathroom. My side hurts to lift anything, so even doing laundry is out. I get tired so easily that cooking dinner is a major feat.

Crohn's Disease. How does one delicately describe this affliction? Since I'm bored, I'll try my best.

Crohn's affects everyone who has it a bit differently. Some have problems in their colon, others in their small intestine. Crohn's has the ability to affect everything from the start of the digestive system (mouth) to the end (I'm sure you can guess where that is). On me, it affects the ileum; that's the little flap that goes between your small and large intestines.

When I have a flare, I get a lot of pain on my right side just under my ribcage. Now, before I'm told that it's my gallbladder or liver, it's not. Trust me. I had everything tested for seven years before coming to a conclusion of Crohn's.

Once the pain starts, I know that the gas and runs aren't too far off. That's the fun part. To be a girl that farts and gets away with it because I have a condition. My husband hates it - he doesn't think it's funny at all that I fart. On the other hand, because I have the mentality of a 12 year old boy, I think it's friggin hysterical. So do my kids. They think it's funny that mommy Heine burps.

So, I fart.

And then other things happen. I won't go into that because that's just gross. I mean really gross. But, it's all part of the disease. You deal with it. It interrupts your life. You move on.

The medicine I take for it (which I missed my last dose due to illness) is called Remicade. This shit's expensive! Just the medicine alone is $10,000! This does not include saline, needles, etc. It's an IV infusion that I'm supposed to get every two months. It takes about two hours to be infused. Not fun when you've got two kids and need to keep them happy in a doctor's office for that long. It's a nasty medicine that suppresses your immune system. While on it, I have to be tested for TB. I can't have any kind of cold before the infusion. Every bug that flies along the sicky highway crashes into me and I'm sicker longer than anyone in my house. Great stuff, let me tell you.

Of course, when I have a flare, I also get some good stuff. Usually, the pain is bad enough to require pain killers. And, I'm not talking Tylenol 3. I'm talking percocet and vicodin. I've been on and off pain killers for so many years that I have to take the harder stuff. It's quite fun, though. The pain goes away and I get sillier than normal. Give me a drink and we're good to go!

So, I keep my chin up. The Remicade flowing. Pop some pain killers. Fart a lot. Poop even more.