"Against All Odds"

How can I just let you walk away, just let you leave without a trace
When I stand here taking every breath with you
You're the only one who really knew me at all

How can you just walk away from me
When all I can do is watch you leave
Cos we've shared the laughter and the pain and even shared the tears
You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now, oh there's just an empty space
And there's nothing left here to remind me,
Just the memory of your face
Ooh take a look at me now, well there's just an empty space
And you coming back to me is against all odds and that's what I've got to face

I wish I could just make you turn around,
Turn around and see me cry
There's so much I need to say to you,
So many reasons why
You're the only one who really knew me at all

So take a look at me now, well there's just an empty space
And there's nothing left here to remind me, just the memory of your face
Now take a look at me now, cos there's just an empty space

But to wait for you, is all I can do and that's what I've got to face
Take a good look at me now, cos I'll still be standing here
And you coming back to me is against all odds
Its the chance I've gotta take

Take a look at me now

Phil Collins, "Against All Odds", 1984

Lessons

Found it! An almost perfect song for the moment!

Sweet memories flashing very quickly by
Reminding me giving me a reason why
I know that my goal is more than a thought
Ill be there when I teach what Ive been taught

You know we've told you before
But you didn't hear us then
So you still question why
You didn't listen again

Sweet memories I never thought it would be like this
Reminding me just how close I came to missing
I know that this is the way for me to go
You'll be there when you know what I know

Rush, "Lessons," 2112, 1976

So, as I reflect back on my and my mom's conversation yesterday, this song reminds me of what we talked about.

We were talking about how happy I was when I had friends that held me up, encouraged me. Loved me for all my geekness in school (yes, i was a geek). I gave all that up. I lost me! And, all these years, my mom has told me this. Time after time.

I know she has. But I didn't listen.

I don't know what has changed, but I'm listening now. I'm ready to finally hear it.

The memories of who I used to be are flooding me. The thoughts of who I can be are flooding me. If I can figure out how to combine the young with the maturing (never adult, I refuse to grow up), I'll be OK.

In fact, I know I'll be OK.