Are There Any Happy Marriages?

I hardly like to refer to an Etsy Etc. forum thread. But this one really stuck to me.

http://www.etsy.com/forums_thread.php?thread_id=6048064

Are there really any happy marriages?

I thought I had one. I sacrificed everything for him. I sacrificed the one thing in the world that should mean more than anything. Myself.

I endured major depression. I endured continual stress to be what I thought he wanted. I stifled my creativity. I stifled me. I tried to be his perfect little girlfriend/wife. Did I have to do this? Probably not. But, he made clear his dissatifaction of things I liked or did. So I stopped doing them.

I realize now that this is not healthy. I should never have given up me for him. I realize now that I am so much more. The friends I have kept and made like me for being the silly and creative person that I am. They like being around me. What a great ego boost to know that I don't have to change to have people like me. The relationship I'm in now makes me so very happy. While we don't always see eye-to-eye and we don't have everything in common, we get along because we're able to be ourselves.

Some sacrifice is necessary. Sacrificing all isn't.

2008 in Review

*sigh*
What a year. What a crazy friggin year.

It started normal enough last January. Birthdays came and went. The first few months of the year sailed by. Then came April.

April is when my marriage started to unravel. Well, actually, it was before that, but that's when things took a turn for the much worse. We tried counseling. I tried to find the love I had had for him previously. It just wasn't there. I couldn't find it. September brought everything crashing down. He kicked me out. It was over.

In the meantime, I really started to find myself again. Who I was 16 years ago, only older and wiser. Well, older anyway. But, my creativity came back. But fun came back. My zest for life came back. I'm still shedding the cocoon, but its going away. And I'm really enjoying becoming a butterfly.

October brought a new job. November brought new friends. November brought Finn.

Now, as Christmas has come and gone, quietly slipping by not unlike any other day, I sit and reflect upon the changes. My kids have noticed that mommy's happier. I've noticed that I'm happier. Even at work, people have noticed a change from when I first started. My friends online have noticed the change. And some are so happy to be there to watch it. And you know what? I'm glad that they're there as well.

So, let's raise a glass to 2009. Here's to a new year! CHEERS!